Monday, January 25, 2016

The Secret Language of Pets

Abby Lab here.  Mom says I know quite a few words already, but I know a LOT more than I let on, many that SHE doesn't know.  For the rest of you felines or canines - I'll clue you in here on some of them.

Barkroom -that small dark closet I go to when it thunders
Ballderdash -  a mad chase across the dog park to fetch the ball.
Floordrobe - that pile of clean clothes that makes the best place to nap when pulled off the bed
Slowbber- lazy drooling
Peticure - getting my nails trimmed
Hairaphernalia - all the grooming stuffs Mom has to keep me looking nice
Napcident - accidentally falling asleep while watching for squirrels
Overtoyed - being SO excited from all the new things to play with
Foodiness - when I sulk because you haven't fed me yet
Vettlement - what Mom ends up paying the vet after the pet insurance settles the claim
Fooditarian - the ability to eat anything that's found on the kitchen floor
Infilthtrate - when I come in the house with muddy paws
Toppleganger - knocking something breakable off the table with my tail
Peeography - mapping out the neighborhood one bush at a time
Incendairy - that time I got diarrhea from eating too much cheese
Naptivating -  something that just makes you want to sleep
Carioki - when I howl to the radio on a drive
Intoxicat - when someone's had a little too much catnip
Petrofried - what happens to me when there's big storms
Meanderthal - people that walk me too slow
Shoeberries -  The little decorative bits that are all that's left of your new shoes
Bathroam - following my Mom wherever she goes
Sockrifice - eating just one sock out of a pair
Peeoccuppied - not paying attention to Mom when I'm doing my business
Cattitude - you know what I'm talking about
Carpolepsy - being all excited about a "drive" then immediately going asleep
Phonundrum - barking at the doorbell when it's really Dad's phone
Mytopia - when the walk to the dog park is longer than it looks
Chillenged - Not wanting to go out and potty when it's 10 degrees out
Fartunate - what you are when someone else in the room gets blamed
Bathing Snoot - putting your cold nose to your owners backside as they get in the shower
Puffalope - a square puffy creature that comes through the slot in the door that's so fun to kill
Petrol - checking every corner of the yard for squirrels
Blamestorming - making it look like the cat did it
Toilert - when I bark because you get up at night to pee
Suppervise - when I have to watch every bite that goes in your mouth
Catsnip - getting Mittins neutered
Shedlines - when Mom realizes she needs to vacuum up the hair today
Abdicat - when you renounce all claims to be head of your kingdom when you get a feline
Travelsty - having to commute to the veterinarian
Nocra- not liking vegetables as "treats"
Mouse Potato - the cat that just sleeps all day
Fartland - a great open expanse of couch that you suddenly have all to yourself.
Bonecall - something you just have to respond to
Askinine - when humans ask "do you want to go out?"
Stuffiecate- How you dispatch the plush squeaky toy before disemboweling it
Epoophany -  I will know the secret of life if you just let me out one more time
Interwet- when I knock Mom's coffee over on the keyboard with my nose
Treat and Great - saying hello to my pet sitter
Lawndry - pulling the clothes off the line is fun!
Reciprocat - taking the neighbor's "free kitten" because they took one of yours
Defence - what the neighbor put up to keep their dogs from getting loose
Affleasement - when I just have to give in to the urge to scratch
Furloin - if I keep licking myself there Mom will give me food to distract me
The Collar Store - where we go to get cheap pet toys
Toester - laying on Mom's feet to keep them warm
Catacombs - where the kitties go hide in the basement when it's time to go in the cat carrier

copyright www.The Book of


  1. We laughed and laughed at these words, we understood many of them!
    stella rose

  2. Hari OM
    BOL... oh Abby, that is quite the vocabulary!!! I would love to hear your carioki... hugs and wags, YAM-aunty xxx

  3. Hey Abby!
    Wow, those had me and my Mom both ROFL!! BWAR HAR HAR These are great and I totally know lots of these words too. BOL Thanks for the great chuckle today! that's funny!
    Grr and Woof,
    Sarge, Police Commish

  4. BOL...Those are some great words!!
    Dory, Jakey, Arty & Bilbo

  5. We've had dogs for many years, how did I not know there were words like travelsty and blamestorming? THANKS for the grin and the fun canine vocabulary lesson!

  6. Those are some new words so we will have to study them!

    Keep Calm & Bark On!

    Murphy & Stanley

  7. OMD OMD OMD ABBY... this is WONDERFUL... Have you thought of making A PETonary? Or a TEASEurus??? You could sell them fur like 87 Bazillion BUCKS.... PEEPS would be SNATCHING them off the shelves... Just sayin... As we are TRYING to get our Breath..

  8. PeeS.... Be SURE to see OUR POST Tomorrow... TOOSday... THIS is a PAWFECT Example of JUST what I was Barkin about... !!!! BRAVO on this Post!!

  9. BOL I couldn't stop laughing.

    Aroo to you,

  10. I love it.... I nearly rolled from my fartland!!!

  11. Abby you are gorgeous and a genius!! These are hilarious!!
    Who is catsnipped and currently a Mouse Potato
    PS we came over from FnE's to say hi..we have met but just wanted to renew our Hidey Hos.
    Hugs madi

  12. You have quite the repertoire of linguistic. Why I bet you are a Mensa Dog for sure.
    Thanks for stopping by my blog
    Sweet William The Scot

  13. We have just come over from Frankie and Ernie's blog and boy are we glad we came to visit. Those are such useful words, for sure.
    Toodle pip!

  14. BOL BOL! We sent this to Dad who is very fond of puns.

  15. Hi, Frankie and Ernie sent us over. we IDENTIFY with most of those words!

  16. Those are some great words! We didn't know many of them, thanks!

  17. BOL! Those are some grreat words!


Welcome to The Book of Barkley. This blog was created for more memories of Barkley as well as updates on Abby the Senior rescue Lab,who we adopted in 2014.

Stop in and say hello. 100% of book sales are donated to animal rescue organizations across the U.S. and Canada and Search Dog Foundation. If you have a non-profit animal organization and would like autographed copies of any of my three books for auction fundraisers or a blog post featuring your organization please contact me at