After watching a few of them, I'm going to teach you what we learned the last few nights.
When it seems that you have killed the monster, never check closely to see if it's really dead.
If you find that your house is built upon or near a cemetery, had previous inhabitants who went mad, flung themselves off the roof, or died in some horrible accident OR inhabitants that dressed in black robes with a giant flaming Pentagram in the yard (I know they said it was a Tupperware party, they lied) move immediately.
Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, especially not as a YouTube video.
Do not search the basement if the power suddenly goes out.
When traveling in numbers, never "pair off" or go it alone.
As a general rule, don't solve puzzles that open portals to Hell.
Never stand in, on, above, below, beside, or anywhere near a grave, tomb crypt, mausoleum or other house of the dead at midnight on Friday the 13th.
If appliances start operating themselves, move out. If it's the 1940's stand mixer, call a Priest.
If you find an old farm town which looks deserted, it's probably for a good reason. Take the hint and turn around. If there are two vacant-eyed kids selling kettle corn at a roadside stand in said deserted town ignore all posted speed limits.
The mutant alien cucumber from "It Conquered the World.
Vegetables can hurt you. Eat more Pizza.
If you hear a strange noise outside Do NOT go out there. Or at least take a weapon, some common sense, or a disposable secondary character to use as a distraction.
Don't babysit - seriously, in scary movies babysitters are psychopath crack. Mow lawns, the psychos never go after the kid mowing the lawn.
When Muppets Do Meth
Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you're really sure you know what you are doing.
If you are running from the monster, boogieman, etc, expect to trip or fall down at least twice, more if you are female and scantily clad. Also note that, although you are running and the monster is merely shambling along - it will still catch up with you
If your car runs out of gas in the middle of nowhere do not knock on the door of the nearest dark dwelling for help. That never ends well.
Don't be a teenager - sure the parties and alcohol and lack of parents at your rave in Mom and Dad's mansion may seem like fun but it just draws demented ax murderers. Case in point. Last night, Mom watched a movie wearing Cuddleduds with hair color on her roots and munching on popcorn. I can guarantee there wasn't an ax murderer within 50 miles.
And lastly folks - if you want to survive to the end of the movie - KEEP YOUR CLOTHES ON!